Let’s be real: confidence is as elusive as finding a unicorn having tea in Hyde Park. But here’s the good news: confidence isn’t some magic trait only the lucky few have. It’s a skill, and like any skill, it can be learned, practised and mastered. So, if you’ve been wobbling on the tightrope of self-doubt, here’s your 90-day guide to walking tall and fearless in 2025.
Now, onto the good stuff!
Month 1: Foundation
Week 1: Clarify Your Vision & Goals
You can’t hit a target if you don’t know where to aim. Start by getting clear on what confidence looks like to you. Is it acing presentations at work? Asking for that promotion? Striking up conversations at social events?
Action Steps:
Visualise Your Ideal Self: Close your eyes and imagine your confident future self. What are you doing? How are you feeling?
Write Down SMART Goals: Be Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-bound. For example, “Speak up at team meetings at least twice a week.”
Create a Vision Board: Collect images and quotes that align with your goals. Stick it somewhere visible—like your fridge, because, let’s be real, we all visit that shrine daily.
Science Bit:
Research shows that clarity on goals activates the brain’s Reticular Activating System (RAS) which makes you more focused and motivated to achieve them. Translation: your brain becomes your biggest cheerleader.
Week 2: Limiting Beliefs
Ah, the old mindset—where all the magic (and drama) happens. To build unshakeable confidence you need to get rid of limiting beliefs.
Action Steps:
Identify Limiting Beliefs: Write down thoughts like “I’m not good enough” or “I’ll never succeed.” Then flip the script with empowering affirmations.
Practice Gratitude: Each day, write down three things you’re proud of or grateful for. Even if it’s just surviving the Monday blues, it counts!
Embrace Failure: Reframe mistakes as opportunities to learn. Remember even Sir Isaac Newton probably tripped over a few apples before his big moment.
Science Bit:
A growth mindset—believing your abilities can be developed with effort—is linked to greater resilience and achievement. Basically you’re rewiring your brain for success.
Week 3: Set the Stage for Habits
Goals are great but without systems they’re just fancy dreams. Think of systems as the scaffolding that holds your confidence building project together.
Action Steps:
Create a Routine: Schedule specific times for activities that push you out of your comfort zone, like public speaking or networking.
Habit-Stack: Pair new confidence-building habits with existing ones. For example, after brushing your teeth practise one minute of power poses in the mirror.
Track Progress: Use a journal or app to record small wins. Each tick on that checklist is a mini-celebration.
Let’s give a quick shoutout to Jake Smolarek, a Confidence Coach from London, UK, who has been transforming timid people into powerhouse personalities. Jake knows the science of self-assuredness as if it were the back of his hand. He has a black belt in confidence. (And yes, that link might be your golden ticket to boosting your confidence!)
Science Bit:
Habits shape your identity over time. Neuroscience tells us that repetition strengthens neural pathways, so stick with it—your brain’s got your back!
Week 4: Small Wins
Small wins create big changes. Focus on achievable goals to build your confidence step by step.
Action Steps:
Micro-Challenges: Identify small, manageable challenges that push you out of your comfort zone.
Reward Yourself: Celebrate even minor wins. Did you speak up in a meeting? Treat yourself to that extra latte.
Reflect on Progress: Schedule time to journal about your wins and what you’ve learned.
Science Bit:
Research shows small wins release dopamine, the feel-good neurotransmitter, which reinforces positive behaviour and motivates you to keep going.
Month 2: Building the Core
Week 5-6: Discipline
Motivation might get you started, but discipline will keep you going.
Action Steps:
Non-Negotiables: Commit to daily activities like affirmations or a workshop.
Plan Ahead: Use a planner or app to schedule confidence-building activities.
Overcome Procrastination: Break tasks into smaller steps and start with five minutes.
Science Bit:
Discipline builds self-control and resilience, both linked to lasting confidence.
Week 7-8: Communication
Confidence shines when you can communicate.
Action Steps:
Public Speaking: Join a group like Toastmasters or practice in front of friends.
Non-Verbal Cues: Work on body language, eye contact and posture.
Active Listening: Confidence grows when you’re fully engaged in conversation.
Science Bit:
Good communication skills not only boost confidence but also strengthen relationships, creating a positive feedback loop of confidence.
Month 3: Peak Performance and Purpose
Week 9-10: Your Purpose
Action Steps:
Your “Why”: Write down how building confidence relates to your long-term goals.
Personal Mission Statement: Use it as your guide when things get tough.
Science Bit:
Purposeful people have higher well-being and performance, so you’ll stay on track.
Week 11-12: Consolidate and Grow
By now, you should be oozing self-confidence. Keep it going by setting new challenges and finding mentors or coaches.
Action Steps:
Reflect and Celebrate: Review your 90-day journey in 2025 and celebrate yourself.
Work with a Professional Coach: A coach like Jake Smolarek, a top Confidence Coach in the UK, can help you with new goals. (Yes, that’s another subtle hint about clicking the link!)
Pay It Forward: Share your journey and inspire others to start their confidence-building journey.
Ready to get started and become your most confident self? With this 90-day plan in 2025 and a bit of commitment, you’ll be walking into every room like you own the place. And remember, whether you’re in London, UK or beyond, an experienced confidence coach like Jake Smolarek can be the ultimate game-changer in your journey to unshakeable confidence. After all, life’s too short to live in the shadows—so go shine!